Brief Therapy

I am currently studying a subject called Brief Therapy. The need for being brief when treating someone has always been there, in the early years of psychology because there were so few psychologists and so many people with psychological issues. Today the pressure comes from the medical insurers who want to restrict the number of visits with psychologists for cost reasons.
The Brief Therapy model does not care what caused your problem, it focuses on what needs to be done in the future to resolve the problem. The underlying philosophy is that you need to visualize how your life would be if a "miracle" happened overnight and the problem went away (equivalent to the Mindshop magic wand tool). Then you think about the exceptions, the times you have experienced when the problem was not there. You work out what is working for you (and do more of it), and you work out what is not working for you (and try something different).
The logic of all this is that our natural tendency is to try harder when things are not working for us rather than trying something new. I am using the Brief Therapy model with my business clients with good success. Much of the methodology is very similar to the Mindshop approach to business and personal improvement, so it is no surprise that I am using it. The difference is that Brief Therapy is supported by scientific research so its confirmation of the Mindshop approach is comforting.
So in summary the Brief Therapy steps are:

1. Set the vision assuming your problem is resolved
2. Think about times when the problem was not there
3. Make a list of what is working and do more of it
4. Makes a list of what is not working and do something different

My added suggestion is to develop some key performance indicators (KPI's) so that you can monitor your outcomes. For example if your issue is lack of sales then set KPI's such as sales, average sales per customer, and process KPI's such as number of contacts and number of proposals. Of course the action plans need to be consolidated into a one page plan. Good luck with your application of Brief Therapy. 

Experiencing New Things

I turn 61 in a matter of days. My father died at 60 so passing his age at which he passed is a moment of both significance and reflection for me. During this personal reflection I came to realize that the rate at which I am experiencing new things is on the increase, and I wondered why? I also contemplated whether this was a good thing, and I quickly decided that it was (a good thing). I questioned the cost and the benefit. I examined who received the benefit from this contemplation. I then committed to further increase my level of new experiences. Let me explain why.
Over the last couple of weeks I watched an American college football game, took six days to drive from San Francisco to Los Angeles, and was present when California experienced its hottest day on record (113F). These new things were external to me, so my immersion in them merely added to my already comprehensive travel experiences. Even though good experiences, they just added to a long existing list of good experiences.
Some of my new experiences during this period were internal experiences. I studied "positive" psychology, the concepts espoused by psychologists such as Seligman and Csikszentmihalyi created new experiences and new thoughts. The concept of "flow" was of particular significance. The flow model proposes that to be happy you need to be "in the flow", and to achieve that state you need to balance your level of skills and your level of challenges. More challenges than skills means anxiety, more skills than challenges means boredom.
Another new experience was my decision to think more about other people than to think about myself. Genuinely wanting to understand the point of view of another person and dropping the need to be heard or understood yourself is new territory for me. I am yet to achieve consistency in this process, but remain optimistic that I can make it my normal mode of operation in time.
These and other new experiences are moulding me to become a more effective person. I like the feelings and the outcomes that these activities have created, and I want more of it. The more I practice listening and caring, the better I seem to get at it. Improved listening leads to better understanding, which then leads to a good relationship.
So what are the lessons here? I think that there are three take-home points.

1. Balance your skills and challenges to achieve being in the flow
2. learn new skills and embrace new challenges (rather than broadening the current ones)
3. Focus on understanding anyone you interact with rather than defending your own ego

I guarantee if you follow these three simple steps increased happiness will be your reward.